Written by Guest Blogger, Sharon Fox.

Child abuse is more than broken bones and bruises. While physical abuse is shocking due to the scars it leaves, not all child abuse is as obvious. Ignoring children’s needs, putting them in unsupervised, dangerous situations, or making a child feel worthless or stupid are also child abuse. Regardless of the type of child abuse, the result is serious emotional harm.

There are several myths about child abuse that need to be addressed. Here are a few of them.

Myths and facts about child abuse and neglect:

MYTH #1: It’s only abuse if it’s violent.

Fact: Physical abuse is just one type of child abuse. Neglect and emotional abuse can be just as damaging, and since they are more subtle, other people are less likely to intervene.

MYTH #2: Only bad people abuse their children.

Fact: While it’s easy to say that only “bad people” abuse their children, it’s not always so black and white. Not all abusers are intentionally harming their children. Many have been victims of abuse themselves, and don’t know any other way to parent. Others may be struggling with mental health issues or a substance abuse problem.

MYTH #3: Child abuse doesn’t happen in “good” families.

Fact: Child abuse doesn’t only happen in poor families or bad neighborhoods. It crosses all racial, economic, and cultural lines. Sometimes, families who seem to have it all from the outside are hiding a different story behind closed doors.

MYTH #4: Most child abusers are strangers.

Fact: While abuse by strangers does happen, most abusers are family members or others close to the family.

MYTH #5: Abused children always grow up to be abusers.

Fact: It is true that abused children are more likely to repeat the cycle as adults, unconsciously repeating what they experienced as children. On the other hand, many adult survivors of child abuse have a strong motivation to protect their children against what they went through and become excellent parents.

If you know of a child who is being abused or neglected, please contact your local Child Protective Services Department or Police. Every child deserves to live a happy and safe life.

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Sharon Fox
Protect Our Children Foundation

Sharon Fox is an author and child abuse activist. Being a survivor of Childhood Sexual Abuse is what prompted her to fight so hard to protect the innocenc of children. To learn more about Sharon and protecting a child or children from abuse and neglect, visit www.goodcookin4u2.webs.com or www.protectourchildren.webs.com .

BUMMER: Unfortunately, the recording had an error and so we do not have the recording available.  We greatly apologize.

Who: Starbright Foundation Inc Founders, Lori & Pastor Mike (http://www.starbrightfoundation.org).

Details: The Starbright Foundation shares how to protect children and young adults from Sex Trafficking and Abusive Relationships. Topics included in the teleseminar were: Internet safety in social media for children and adults (dating, chat rooms, etc.); Signs of abuse from sexual abuse, clergy abuse, cultic abuse, etc. and steps to intervene in house or in community; Local fundraising or involvement as volunteers.  Your host was Mike Domitrz from the The Date Safe Project.

Cost was FREE.

***You must sign-up below to have access to the recording. Then you can listen to the entire interview at any time you choose.

Who: Amanda Graybill, Founder of The Little Black Dress Society (www.lbdsociety.com) and author of the book: “The Little Black Dress.”

Details: Listen in as Amanda Graybill is interviewed by Mike Domitrz from the The Date Safe Project.  Amanda’s book “The Little Black Dress” is an inspirational fiction about a young woman who runs away from home looking for love in all the wrong places. Amanda will share how more people can get involved in reducing abuse and how to help those in abusive relationships. She is committed to getting more women involved in her mission and will share why doing so is important (and how to do so).

Cost: FREE (Register Below)

In the VOTING section below, share your favorite statements (list the # of the statement – such as #21, #99, etc…) and include WHY!   You are highly encouraged to ADD additional statements you would like to see  on posters. Any words in GREEN FONT below are questions we here at The Date Safe Project Inc are asking YOU TO ANSWER.

Please remember we focus on positive solutions in our mission here at The Date Safe Project Inc.

FYI – all of the below statements came from students in DelRay Beach, Florida and in the Holland, Michigan region (Thanks, Jennifer and Lesley):

1. “Just because I CAN contact my partner 24/7, doesn’t mean I have the RIGHT to or should!”
2. “If you want to be with me, respect my boundaries.  Independence is a priority for me in relationships.”
3. “I talk before deciding to commit to a relationship.  Knowing each other’s boundaries is FUN and the RIGHT thing to do.”
4. “She said her friends & family are an important part of her life.  I agree. Plus, having time apart is HEALTHY!”
5. “I enjoy time spent with my partner AND with the other special people in my life.”
6. Respect is Brave/Bravery (what imagery would you want with this?)
7. Loving someone is not the same as having property.  You DON’T OWN me!
8. I’m not ready for a kid.  If you are, find someone else.
9. Pressure, control, uncomfortable = not love.
10. 2B or not 2B brave enough to speak out against dating violence
11. Control is not Love

Place your VOTES below:

Did you see the show? What was your reaction? How do you think such imagery could impact viewers?

For every person who provides a true YouTube solution to sexual assault (not a parody or a joke) and shares it with us here at The Date Safe Project Inc, we will put your name (and/or your organization’s name) into a monthly drawing for your choice of the following:

50 “Do You Ask?” POSTERS (you pick how many of each of the 12 posters you want). Preview the fun and educational posters here.

800 “Can I Kiss You?” Temporary Tattoos.  Preview the fun and educational posters here.

25 “May I Kiss You?” Books.  Preview the critically acclaimed book here.

25 “Voices of Courage” Books.  Preview the book and CDs utilized around the world here.

10 “HELP! My Teen Is Dating” DVD/book sets.  Preview the award-winning program here.

10 T-shirts:  “Can I Kiss You?” (on the front)/   “Do You Ask?  Take a Moment to Care” (on the back).  Preview shirts here.

10 T-shirts:  “Want Some Action?” (on the front) / “Take the Pledge 4 Action” (on the back with 4 guidelines).  Preview shirts here.

The GUIDELINES:

Submit your video to YouTube and then share with us the YouTube address for your video in our “COMMENTS” section of this post.  Lastly, visit the CONTACT US page on this website to send us your contact information and which submission is yours (all contact information is kept confidential until you give permission to share such information).  Another option is to send your video on a DVD and will post the video for you (mail to: The Date Safe Project Inc, c/o YouTube Solutions, PO Box 20906, Greenfield, WI 53220-0906).  All appropriate videos (must be standards of a PG / PG-13 movie rating) will be entered into each week’s drawing.

Once a week, you will have a chance to WIN your choice of ONE of the prizes listed above.  The sooner you submit a video, the sooner you have a chance to win.  Each week’s submissions are ADDED to all the previous submissions.

Example:  If you submit a video on June 30th, you will be in the drawing EACH MONTH for the rest of the time this YouTube Challenge is running.

SUBMIT TODAY!!

“What hurts the victim most is not the cruelty of the oppressor, but the silence of the bystander” ~ Elie Wiesel

What does this quote make you think of?  Share examples in our COMMENTS section of situations where you’ve seen people take ACTION on behalf of someone else being oppressed and/or examples of where everyone FAILED to take action.  By sharing the success stories, we can help others be inspired to do the same.  By examining the failures, we can create solutions for the future.

Leave your examples in our COMMENTS section.  I will personally respond to each comment.

If they wanted a universal dress code for boys and girls, then the logic makes more sense (not saying we agree or disagree with the logic).  However, the “danger” reasoning seems to blame the women INSTEAD of the people who are the DANGER.  Who is going to harm the females for wearing skirts?  How about the school have consequences for the individuals who are willing to harm females based on the clothes the females choose to wear?  Put the responsibility where it belongs – on the person doing the wrong!

The real point of discussion in this case is, “How often do adults mask an issue with a fake excuse – with their own tweens, teens, or with students they teach??  The result?  You lose credibility with the person you are making the rule up for.“  Be honest with yourself and the young adults you are teaching.

Share cases of where you or someone who fell into this trap in the “Leave a Comment” section.  I will personally respond to each comment and then we will work to create a better solution than what actually occurred.

On this hectic day for many of being “Black Friday”  shopping, RUN QUICKLY to someone you need to say, “THANKS” to and tell them!

As today is Thanksgiving, THANKS to you and all the supporters who work to support our mission – “Asking First” + “Being a Friend” + “Opening a Door.”