Be ACCOUNTABLE in Life and Relationships:

Welcome to this month’s exclusive interview with a dear friend of mine, Sam Silverstein.  Sam is the Founder of the Accountability Academy, THE international expert on personal accountability, and the author of the powerful life-changing book No More Excuses!

To PLAY the interview on this website, click on the PLAY BUTTON below. To DOWNLOAD the interview onto your computer to listen to at another time on your phone, computer, and/or any audio device, CLICK on the DOWNLOAD link below.

As you listen to the interview and after the interview is done, ASK QUESTIONS and LEAVE COMMENTS in the Comments sections below. To have fun, login to FaceBook while you are on this webpage. Doing so will enable you to leave FaceBook comments which will intrigue your family and friends to get involved.

Would you like to get access to all 12 interviews? Click here to purchase NOW!

While many towns and cities around the country debate how and if “Sex Ed” should be handled IN the school, WHO needs “Sex Ed” becomes an interesting question. This past summer in an article that didn’t capture the media’s attention, a college student stated he thought PARENTS need Sex Ed today.

As I travel the world speaking with parents, many Moms and Dads share real stories of how naive their fellow parents are when it comes to dating and sexual activity among their pre-teen and teenager sons and daughters. Parents constantly share how everyone wants to believe, “Not my child.”

For parents who do believe in discussing Sex Ed at home, some if not many often don’t know HOW to talk about the issue – besides trying to scare their child away from intimacy. When you share with parents about a sexual fad taking place among school age children, many Moms and Dads look at you with disbelief. Sometimes, you even hear someone say, “I’m 45 years old and have never tried that – and never would.” Their children are thinking and sometimes acting beyond their parent’s imagination.

What do you think? Do today’s parents need Sex Education? What do you think parents need to learn and/or discover? Since many people say, “That is a subject which should be taught at home,” is home the ONLY right place for teaching “Sex Ed”?  Would teaching both AT HOME and AT SCHOOL be more effective or less? Do most parents at home have the right information for teaching the subject matter? If you think parents do need Sex Ed, how would you recommend providing the education and actually getting parents to attend?

Share your thoughts and ideas in the COMMENTS section below.

Safe

Words carry parents and children through whimsical conversations about how many stars light up the night sky; or talks about the amazing strength of flowers to emerge from underground, even though they feel so fragile to touch. Engaging a young child’s curiosity and imagination can be very entertaining when talking is natural, easy and safe.

Yet, what happens during an uncomfortable conversation? Body language and facial expressions have as much power as spoken words (and perhaps sometimes more). Any parent watching a teenager pout, roll their eyes or grunt in disgust can attest to that! Young children are susceptible to the power of unspoken messages too. When a parent is visibly uncomfortable with a conversation and shuts down, children shut down too. Communication breaks down and the topic becomes unapproachable. A precedent is set for which topics are safe to talk about and which ones are not.

During my workshops, adults illustrate the damage of unsafe talks, carrying needless pain from childhood: “When my mother was sick with cancer, no one talked about it…even though I was only eight they should’ve trusted me.” Trust is a valuable tool that anchors families. No matter how well intentioned, children are not protected in being sheltered; they are, in fact, denied the ability to make a viable difference. On the contrary, children are protected when parents talk about what’s comfortable and uncomfortable. Doing so helps everyone gain coping tools, acquire insight and establish trust in relationships. That is protection that lasts a lifetime.

Curiosity and imagination shouldn’t disappear in childhood…and neither should whimsical conversations. As children grow older, so will their hopes, dreams, curiosities and fears. Yet, they never outgrow the need for safe talks. Protect them by talking about peer pressure, alcohol, dating and sex—in age appropriate ways throughout their growing up years.

——————————

WRITTEN BY: Maryann Makekau, Author & Inspirational Speaker

Copyright 2011

www.becausehopematters.com

Click on image for full size version.

To the right, you are going to see an “Award Winning” Advertisement from KIA involving a teacher and a student. Be warned the Ad is considered disturbing by many observers. Please help us tell KIA and advertising firms around the world that this approach to marketing and selling is unacceptable! To promote pedophilia to sell or market a product is both sad and disgusting.

What can you do?  Write KIA through their website. Contact your local and national media (TV networks, Radio networks, newspapers) and let your outrage be known.  Remind KIA to show corporate responsibility in every aspect of their company.  In the COMMENTS section of this post, share your ideas for helping to get this Advertisement removed.

LATEST UPDATE: KIA Motors has responded at the following link on their website: http://www.kiaresponds.com/brazil-ad.html

While this apology is a good start, we wanted to Kia to be ensuring the advertisement will not appear anywhere in the world to advertise their products (not just in the USA or their corporate headquarters in Korea).

Kia has responded to our request by sending us the following personal tweet:  ”And our parent company Kia Motors Corporation has guaranteed the ads have never and will never run globally.“

Thank you, Kia Motors, for removing any possibility of such an Ad ever be used. We look forward to you setting up standards and a system to ensure such marketing mistakes cannot happen again in the future.

You will learn of:  Teenagers who previously didn’t engage with their parents and NOW are openly sharing with Mom and Dad.  I will share specific examples from families where Mom and Dad experienced an “Aha” moment with their daughter.  Getting children to WANT to discuss dating with you as parents is HUGE.

When you finish the video, SHARE with us in the “Speak Your Mind ” section below. I promise to PERSONALLY respond to each person.

~Mike Domitrz
Founder of The Date Safe Project, Inc.

RESULTS of USING STRATEGIES FOR TALKING WITH YOUR TEEN

IMPORTANT REMINDER: Each of the following videos refers to talking with “Teenagers.” Remember if you are a parent of a child younger than 13 years old, the videos give you a fantastic opportunity to prepare your child at an even younger age.

CLICK HERE TO WATCH NEXT VIDEO (BONUS VIDEO #5)

Please post any comments or questions below in the “Speak Your Mind” section.
I will PERSONALLY respond to each comment you leave on this page!! Lets have fun taking this journey.

You don’t censor with WebWatcher. You watch what decisions are being made on your computers. The information you learn helps you have better conversations with your teens about “appropriate use of the internet.”  You are not spying because you can tell your teens you keep an eye on the computers in the house (after all, your home computer lets people in and out of your home at any hour someone is on that computer).

We need to understand texting can have an equal impact on your child and/or family.  When Texting first came out, many of us advised parents from having teens use Texting unless for an emergency situation. Now the use of texting is so widespread, all of us must learn to address the “appropriate and proper use” of texting.

How and When are your teens texting? According to a recent study by the creators of an app called textPlus, “43% of teenagers use their cell phones to text during class.” From educators I’ve spoke with, they believe 43% may be low. Here is a great example of improper use. How do you solve it? Share how having a phone or iTouch comes with responsibility.

Share with your teenager, “I believe you can handle the responsibility which is why you have a phone/iTouch.  If you can’t handle the responsibility, then we need to limit the use of your phone and/or iTouch. For instance, if we discover the phone/iTouch is being used during school, you will not be able to take the phone/iTouch to school.  We’re not going to yell out.  We will simply require you leave it at home when going to school.“

Yes, I am the parent of high school students.  I understand the pressure for parents to feel like “All the other parents let their kids do whatever they want with their phones.”  However, you hopefully wouldn’t let your teenager use that false logic for decision-making of “everyone else is doing it” and so remind yourself not to fall into the trap when parenting.

The classroom use of texting is just one example of the distraction texting can cause in one’s life. The dangers of texting are much worse.  We haven’t even mention sexting in today’s blog (because we’ve addressed sexting in the past and will do so again in the near future).

Share your thoughts, fears and/or concerns about texting in our COMMENTS section below. I will personally respond to each comment!

QUICK TIDBIT:
While there is no guarantees with parenting, the more involved and AWARE you are in your child’s life, the more you have an opportunity to create a positive impact!

Remember to leave a comment below. I look forward to personally responding to each comment!!!

or

My daughter is very sharp.
She wouldn’t let herself be with someone who mistreats her.

Lets start with the “respectful” question:
Most “respectful” and “sharp” males and females still learn about aspects of intimacy through their friends and what they see portrayed on television and in the movies. These sources of education promote disrespectful behavior by teaching males that if they are “smooth,” they can just make their moves and their partner will want them.

Did you know a child believing he or she is automatically respectful can lead to more problems. How?  They assume everything they do is respectful because they would never do anything wrong.

Example of a young person in a sexual situation: Kids tell themselves, “I would never do anything to hurt this person. Clearly, they want this sexual activity – because if they didn’t, the signs wouldn’t be this obvious that they do want me.”  Your child leans on their view of “respect” as an excuse for, “I wouldn’t do anything wrong” – instead of insuring they take the right precautions and QUESTION whether they are acting in the most respectful manner possible.

When someone just “make their moves,” he or she takes a tremendous risk of engaging in behavior that their partners do not want – thus leading to committing a sexual assault. Parents need to talk with their sons and daughters about truly respecting a partner by understanding how valuable and special each person is as a human being (including the body, the mind, sexuality, personality, and values). Sons and daughters need to learn that the only way you can be sure what your date wants is to “ask” your date first.  The key is knowing HOW to provide your teen the skills to “Asking First.”

Lets continue with the “sharp” question:
You know many intelligent people who make mistakes – sometimes bad mistakes.  Intelligence does not free anyone from poor choices. Plus, your child is not the only one who has an impact on the situation. What if your child makes all the right choices and someone else still forces him or her self onto your child, especially at a party or friend’s house?

To increase the chance for creating a safe environment, you want to give your daughter (or son) the SKILLS NEEDED to handle all different kinds of scenarios (good, bad, and sometimes worse).  Some parents mistakenly think, “I’ll teach my children self-defense or how to to fight.  That will stop anyone from messing with them.”  Wrong!  While self-defense maybe another tool your child could possess, it does not guarantee safety in intimate moments (especially when your child gets older and may consume alcohol).  Your child needs specific tools and skills.  You want to fill their toolbox of awareness with lots of options for them to utilize.

- written by Mike Domitrz, Founder & Executive Director, The Date Safe Project, Inc.
To obtain permission to reprint any or all portions, E-mail Mike here

Have you heard about the award-winning DVD HELP! My Teen Is Dating. Realistic Solutions to Tough Conversations? The award the DVD has received which means the most to many parents is the ”Best Parenting Book” award by RadicalParenting.com.

Why?  Teenagers chose the best books!!  Yes, the books were considered to be the most realistic and helpful for teenagers!!  How often can you find a resource for your teenagers that other teens recommend? Here is what they said when granting the recognition:

“Parents, teens, and tweens love the realistic and flexible solutions given to them in this interactive, entertaining, and useful resource. Regardless of your child’s personality, you will find various options for ways to connect with your son or daughter while helping him/her make better choices.“

DISCOVER MORE HERE.

Every year, we at The Date Safe Project Inc donate a number of presentations to non-profits and organizations requesting our help.  Giving back to the community and society is an important part of our mission.  Thus in 2011, we are greatly increasing the number of programs we will be donating!

To be considered for a donated presentation, go to our “Contact Us” page and answer the following questions (be sure to give us all your answers in detail):

1. The Details of the Event: time, date, and place (facility, city, state).
2. Hosting organization.
3. Goal of the event.
4. Who and how many individuals will be in attendance. Be SPECIFIC.  How many of each of the following groups will be attending: parents, educators, crisis centers, and students?  For students, tell us how many of each age group (middle school, high school, college/university).
5. Do you have Sponsors for the event (local, regional, or national corporations)?
6. Is the event a Fund-Raiser for a non-profit?
7. WHY you believe your event should receive a donated presentation.
8. If your event is not within 120 miles of Milwaukee (WI), would you be willing to pay for travel expenses: transportation, flights (if needed), lodging, and food?

URGENCY:
The sooner you apply, the BETTER!  The Fall is almost already full and so your best option for available dates is the next few months (January – March).  You could ask for a date one week from now and potentially be granted your request!  Why?  Campuses are just getting back and K12 school systems are in the middle of finals. Consequently, availability does exist.  This is the BEST time to make a request.

IMPORTANT: Please understand that while we are greatly increasing the number of donated shows for 2011, not everyone will be able to receive a donated program. If we are not able to fill your request for a donated presentation, we WILL be happy to work with you to provide funding options for still bringing the requested program to your community.

REMEMBER to go to our “Contact Us” page and answer all the previous questions listed above (be sure to give us all your answers in detail). Help make a HUGE IMPACT in your community today!!