High school students at West Allis Central High School discuss their reactions after the “Can I Kiss You?” show at their school where the entire student body participated in the General Assembly. Academic Dean Laura Wescott and Principal Paul Mielke did a great job insuring everything ran smoothly!
All Guys are Jerks and Women are Trouble
How often have you heard a teenager, student, and/or parents make statements such as, “All guys are jerks” and/or “All girls are trouble“? Often people use derogatory generalizations to scare younger individuals from dating and/or to help a friend “feel better” after being unhappy in a relationship. Watch this episode of DSP TV to see if such statements are helpful.
What Tools Do YOU have ready?
15 miles from Poughkeepsie, NY this past week and on my way to speak at Vassar College, the tire on my rental car blows out! I was in a remote area on a Restricted Roadway (tow trucks cannot service the area without a State Police request first). I like to give myself an extra hour leeway for driving time to be safe and I did in this case. However, the Emergency Service said they may need that entire time to get to me. What do I do? First, I called the school to give them the entire situation – to insure no one was surprised or taken off guard.
Next, I went into the trunk and started working on changing the tire myself. Everything was going well. I had the car jacked up and then suddenly realized the hubcap was not coming off. A few minutes later, a state highway vehicle pulls up and helps me get the tire changed. What could have easily have been 75-90 minutes turned into only 20 minutes and everything went smoothly. Why? The state emergency employee had a special tool for getting the hubcap off. I arrived at Vassar with PLENTY of time to spare (no pun intended) before conducting my sound check.
When working on talking with teens and students on sexual decision-making, do you leave leeway for what could go wrong in your conversation? What could blow up your conversation? Someone’s temper, attitude, assumptions, judgement? How do you prepare for those possibilities? Do you practice the exact scenario? I’ve changed tires before. However, I had never run into a HubCap problem before (the Emergency Service had). Even though I had a little experience, I needed more tools to solve my problem. What tools could help you in creating a positive impact with teens and young adults decisions regarding sexual decision-making, supporting survivors, and bystander intervention?
Share below by LEAVING A COMMENT about what you do and/or have done to best prepare for all the “What If” scenarios when talking to teens and young adults.
Students and Customer Service
Do you work with students? When they first approach, do you think, “How can I help this student today? How can I make his or her day AWESOME?” Imagine if every student felt educators and professionals had that goal in mind for them.
In the past 24 hours, I was doused with great customer service. Last night driving to speak at Vassar College, my back tire blew in a remote, restricted road. I was only 15 miles from the campus, yet tow trucks weren’t allowed in that area without the State Police coming by first. I was being told it could take over an hour. Uh oh. Thank goodness, I left early for “just in case” moments like this. Suddenly, a state highway truck pulled up. He said when the call went to the state police, he noticed. In 10 minutes, he had me on my way with a fantastic attitude!!
Today on my flight from DC to Kansas City (yes first I flew from NY to DC), our flight attendant was one of the best I’ve ever experienced. His name was Joe, a retired police officer who took JOY in having fun with everyone (co-workers, customers, etc…). He told us all how much people take their jobs too seriously. He wanted everyone on the flight to have fun. I almost didn’t want to sleep just to see what more he would do.
Then arriving at my hotel in Kansas City, Sarah lit up the room as she welcomed you to the property. She wanted you to know to help yourself to anything you needed and you could have unlimited numbers of water bottles.
Now imagine we treated those we care about with the AMAZING attitude and approach I was blessed to experience today. How more open would everyone be to learning from us?
Boy Scouts Share Important Message
Are you ever asked, “How do you know you are making a difference? How do you know your audience (or students) actually remembers your message?” Speakers in the education world and teachers particularly get this question a lot because so many people wonder if teens retain the messages being shared with them. Yesterday, audience members surprised me.
For the past week, my son was in the Northern Woods camping with his Boy Scout Troop (6 hours from our home). When he arrived home with his Troop, he began sharing all his great stories from the week (catching a 25″ Northern and getting the “Lumberjack” Award). In mid-sentence, he suddenly said, “Dad, try to guess what happened?“
“What?” I asked.
Son: “I got some free food and extra stuff from the store for free because they knew you.“
Me: ”WHO knew me?“
Son: ”The boys working in the store.“
Me: ”Who were they?“
Son: ”I don’t know. They saw my name ‘Domitrz’ and asked if I was related to you. When I said, ‘Yes,’ they talked about your program and how awesome it was. Then they gave me some stuff and EXTRA FOOD!!“
Me: ”Were the boys from around here and working all the way up there for the summer?“
Son: “No, but they knew you.“
Me: ”How old were they?“
Son: ”High school age guys.“
While I’ve been blessed to hear stories of people seeing students wearing my “Can I Kiss You?” and “Want Some Action?” shirts in fun locations (Disney World, etc…), this quick conversation was soo much cooler. To know high school students in the middle of the Northern woods at a Boy Scout camp (6 hours away) KNEW MY NAME was the surprise. Had my son been wearing one of my shirts and these boys thought of the connection to me, I would have still have been pleasantly honored to know my audience had such a positive memory. To know they knew my LAST NAME was the shocker. They simply saw “Domitrz” and started talking to my son.
Neither I nor my son are the focus of this story. This small group of audience members get and deserve all the credit. Each of these young men made a CHOICE to open their minds and commit to change (not letting an important message be forgotten – even months after originally hear the concept). Regardless of what friends said, the entertainment world displayed before them, and their peers who tried to influence them otherwise, these students stuck to message they believed in! Kudos to each of them.
I only wish I had way to say, “Thanks” to each of them personally. Thanks for sharing with my son. Thanks for believing in a positive message.
Why do I share this quick story? With the amazing talent you possess, I know you have peers and/or audience members you never knew you impacted – those same individuals who are excited to tell others they heard you and want to spread the message. Here is to the blessings of being a speaker, educator, activist, and/or caring individual making an impact. Thank you for all you do to make this world a better place.
The General Assembly Parents LOVE to bring to their schools!
When it comes to middle schools and high schools teaching teenagers vital skills for decision-making regarding teen dating, intimacy, a comprehensive safety approach to sex and/or abstinence, MANY school systems do very little because they are afraid of how parents will react. Thus, students learn from each other and we all know teens teaching teens about sex is extremely dangerous.
In fact, today you are hearing more new stories from school systems and communities across the country involving teenage sexually transmitted diseases and infections. Plus, research is showing sexual activity is occurring at much younger ages.
As a parent, how can YOU MAKE A DIFFERENCE? Work with your local school administrators to bring an interactive and educational program with long-lasting impact for your students. Bring in a program which does more than “Raise Awareness” – find a presentation which gives students precise skills they can immediately use in their lives. When leaders and educators see parents taking an active role in wanting a specific program for their students, many educators and administrators feel more comfortable moving forward and taking the needed action to bring the program to the school.
One of the most sought after experts in the country for providing these necessary skills to teenagers is Mike Domitrz, the Executive Director of The Date Safe Project Inc. and the author of HELP! My Teen Is Dating. His one-person show for students titled “Can I Kiss You?” is praised by parents, educators, administrators, and TEENAGERS! Unlike many experts who lecture students toward one specific agenda, Domitrz opens students’ minds to making better choices for themselves, their friends, and any potential future dating partners. Because of this unique approach, the “Can I Kiss You?” program is supported by parents on both sides of the heated debate between “Abstinence-Only Education” vs “Comprehensive Sex Ed” taking place in many communities.
Bring this one-of-a-kind General Assembly to your school, students, and community.
Click here for more information.
